Weekend Under Siege
_Field report filed by Coal._
I arrived Friday
under the impression
that I was being dropped off
for a weekend of spoiling.
This was _technically_ true.
What wasn’t disclosed…
was the siege.
At first,
I growled.
A proper growl.
Low.
Clear.
Carrying eleven years
of institutional authority.
Orca heard it
and exercised something
_resembling_ caution.
For a while.
Then she made
an unfortunate discovery:
the growl wasn’t attached
to any actual consequences.
From that moment forward,
every object in my possession
became the most important object
in the known world.
“Is that your blanket?”
“It was.”
“You didn’t want it five seconds ago.”
“You had it five seconds ago.”
Blanket.
Toy.
Bowl.
Human attention.
She took it,
celebrated,
lost interest,
then waited for me
to make it valuable again.
By the second day,
I accepted that resistance
was accomplishing nothing.
So I made one tactical adjustment.
I played back.
This shouldn’t be interpreted
as enjoyment.
It was conflict management.
Morale preservation.
The practical decision
of a mature dog
who couldn’t stop the puppy
and might as well
have some fun with it.
Then the humans left
for the Braves game.
Seven hours.
Our only unsupervised interval
of the entire weekend.
No official account
of those hours
will be provided.
The house remained standing.
We were both alive.
And by the time they returned,
Orca had apparently concluded
that my participation
proved the siege was now
a mutually organized activity.
It wasn’t.
Probably.
In closing:
I was fed.
I was spoiled.
I was kept much too busy
to properly miss Mari.
And I may,
under sustained questioning,
admit that I had fun.
This admission can’t
reach the puppy.
She already has everything else.
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